... Eaten with tea.

As any Anglophile knows, tea is the most miraculous and wonderful drink in the entire cosmos of Beveragedom (excluding the Alcoholic Refreshment Galaxy). Tea cures most ills, whether they be hunger, unhappiness, thirst, or cold, and it does it all while staying gloriously calorie free. Which is lucky for the people of tea-land, also known as the United Kingdom, since the cold and rain they endure for most of the year would make even the most upbeat of citizens succumb to Seasonal Affective Disorder ALL YEAR ROUND. (I would know, I spent a tea-filled semester there once.)

Anyways, the transformative emotional powers of tea help make any food you consume with it absolutely calorie free. The power of tea to figuratively lift your spirits takes literal calories. Keeping those spirits high during the fourth straight sun-less month of rain is even harder. Luckily tea is one of the few substances up to the challenge, and this force of power burns through any calories in the food you consume with it. Bow to your Earl Grey!

Additionally, tea is best consumed while hot. Not only does this help you burn calories since your body has to work to cool it down before digesting, but it also boils away any calories you eat while drinking it. In addition to being too small to actually contain many calories, those finger sandwiches and tiny cakes on your afternoon tea tray are boiled up in your stomach before any calories can be extracted. In fact, they are necessary to keep the hot tea from scalding your insides. So tea lovers, go ahead and have another spoonful of clotted cream (especially if it's raining)! You deserve it!