... If they don't taste good.

Yes, vegetables are healthy and therefore calorie free. And yes, they also often taste gross. But that's not the reason that foods that don't taste good don't count. It's actually because of the incredible power of your brain to distinguish between delectable treats that make your whole body feel good, and gross food that makes you regret digging in. This ability is known as the "blood brain barrier." Oh, you thought "blood brain barrier" referred to the "separation of circulating blood and cerebrosprinal fluid in the central nervous system?" Wrong!

 Menu-don't.

The blood brain barrier is actually one of your body's strongest defenses against unwanted calories. Here's how it goes: when you eat food that tastes bad, your brain automatically kicks in to gear, rejecting the unwanted calories, and keeping them from entering your blood stream and later sticking to your butt and thighs. As a history major, I know that this metabolic function is a bi-product of our earlier cavewoman days, when eating spoiled deer meat (or whatever) could be deadly, and the warning signs were probably the fact that it tasted like (deer) ass. Our bodies learned to reject gross tasting food to save our lives, and help us fit into our skimpier loincloths.

So if you accidentally eat a meal that you didn't particularly enjoy, fear not. Your body will reject the calories in order to keep you safe and thin. You should probably eat a more delicious meal as soon as possible, though. Or else you could suffer from a dangerous calorie deficiency.